Top 5 Villains Remix!

July 14, 2009

Matt inspired me with his list of villains. So I decided to rip off his fab idea and do my own! In no particular order:

Nicky Holiday – The Great Muppet Caper
Sure next to all these other maniacal madmen (and women) Nicky Holiday seems like a lovable old chap. I assure you, Charles Grodin is not a nice guy. Not only does he frame Miss Piggy he also toys with her delicate emotions. Unforgivable! I included this incarnation of Grodin on my list because he is an over the top and hilarious antagonist in this, my favorite, muppet adventure.

Annie Wilkes – Misery
Annie Wilkes is fucking crazy. I’m not sure what else needs to be said. If you’ve seen Misery and I sincerely hope you have, you know why she belongs on this list. Kathy Bates does a top notch job bringing this threatening and obviously unbalanced woman to life. Her childlike innocence and violent temper are a chilling combo.

Grand High Witch – The Witches
Why kids movies? Well, they tend to have villains that lack any depth. The second you put internal struggle into a character I start empathizing and looking for the good. Not The Grand High Witch. She is bad to the bone. With her violet eyes and propensity for turning children to mice, Anjelica Huston’s portrayal of this power hungry witch is enough to make anyone cower.

Chamberlain – The Dark Crystal
This is the final Henson creation on my list, I promise! The Chamberlain is the most slimy, scheming and despicable of all the Skeksis. He is a villain to all Gelflings and therefore is a villain to me. His maniacal and annoying cooing is the stuff of legend. No character, human or puppet, has done so much double crossing and made so many annoying sounds. That has earned the Chamberlain a place on my list.

The Masks – Halloween III: Season of the Witch
I promise I’m not trying to be difficult. Halloween 3 is one of my top 80′s horror films. I could go on a tangent about how it’s cursed with the “Halloween” moniker and how Tom Atkins is an unsung cinematic hero. I mean, I kind of just did… but we will leave it at that. I stand by my assertion that the Silver Shamrock masks are villains. Hell, they scare me half to death. These seemingly simplistic masks will lock onto your head and turn you in bugs and snakes. I shiver at the thought! And don’t try to tamper with the chip or else a crazy beam will bust your face open! These latex beauties mean business. God I love that movie…

Now just a quick end note. My goal was to include “villains” who were unapologetic for their actions. People (or things) that showed no remorse and inspired no sympathy. I also decided to omit some picks that may have been a bit more obvious ie: The Tall Man of Phantasam fame, The murdering Birds from The Birds, Leatherface (even though I’m the tool who feels bad for him) and Anton Chigurh from No Country for Old Men. I am sure I will think of more later.

Author | Christine

Christine enjoys obsessing over Paracinema. She also loves well written hour long TV dramas. Her free time is spent with her many boyfriends: Brian De Palma, Edgar Wright & Alfred Hitchcock.

Ashlee

That damn blinking pumpkin, that Silver Shamrock song… I hear and see it now!

All movies and villians mentioned are what made my childhood so grand.

Leatherface has always been a poor sap of an overgrown infant. Not layered but you still wished he was given a hug or two.
Matt-suzaka

I started laughing the second I saw the pic of Piggy and Grodin! I love that movie.

I have always loved and defended Season of the Witch…I love that song so much you don't even know! People over the past few years have started to come around saying they like the film nowadays.

Annie Wilkes is wicked scary, and Misery is wicked awesome.

I saw both The Dark Crystal and The Withes in theaters as a kid and haven't seen either since around that time. I surprisingly remembered a lot from the trailer of The Witches you posted…reminds me of a Peter Jackson film pre-Lord of the Rings. I am gonna have to see both of those films again…great list copy cat!
Emily

The Grand High Witch is an excellent choice. My poor 4 year old niece has been traumatized by that movie. I guess the whole trying-to-destroy-all-children thing didn't exactly bounce off her lil back.

I do, however, beg to differ on the biggest Muppet Baddie. Charles Grodin does toy a little with Miss Piggy, but I think she needed some talking down after all the hell she puts poor Kermie through. I mean, at least he doesn't try to make an entree out of her like Charlens Durning in The Muppet Movie.
Joe Humphrey

I have to agree with you on most of these (I never saw Halloween 3, and I don't remember anything about The Dark Crystal). I'd forgotten about The Witches, and I remember Angelica Houston being fucking crazy scary in that movie. I was a fan of the book when I was a kid, and I remember the movie coming out and being skeptical about whether or not it would be as vicious at the book, and was pleasantly surprised that it certainly.

I'd have to add the hotel from The Shining to the list myself.

And I'm also going to have to agree with Emily about Doc Hopper as the best Muppet villain.
christine

Here's a secret and you can not hold it against me… I kinda hate "The Muppet Movie" *recoil*

OK, hate is a super strong word. But it's my least favorite. Well, maybe "Muppets in Space" is my least favorite… Either way! I have never been a fan. So that may explain my frog leg based omission.

Thanks all for reading!
christine

Oh and Matt,
I can totally see the Peter Jackson thing!
Emily

The Muppet Movie isn't my favorite, but it's the origin tale! Plus it has some of the best songs. Personally, nothing holds a candle to The Muppets Take Manhattan. I thoroughly enjoyed the Xmas Special from three years ago but would rank Treasure Island as the worst of the bunch.
Joe Humphrey

HATE THE MUPPET MOVIE?!

Blasphemy!

The Muppet Movie is one of my favorite movies. For me, it's the theme of the movie. Following The Dream no matter what gets in your way and no matter what other people say. The fact that "the dream" is about making movies is even more personal for me.

Plus, the music in that movie was just brilliant. Between Gonzo's song about suicide (I'm Going to go Back There Some Day) to Kermit and Rolf's song about modern men trying to get laid and, possibly, depending on how much you want to read into it, homosexuality (I Hope that Something Better Comes Along), The Muppet Movie just rocks. Add the cameos from Richard Pryor, Steve Martin, Mel Brooks, James Cobern, Madaline Kahn and Orson freakin Welles and a million other awesome people. I just love it.
Joe Humphrey

So… um… Christine….

I just watched Halloween III, based on your recomendation here…

Why did you do this to me? I never hurt you. I've always tried to be kind and decent. Why would you do this horrible, horrible thing to me?
christine

Really Joe?!
How is it possible for you to dislike that film?!
IT IS SO GOOD!
Joe Humphrey

I can't quite figure out if you're being sarcastic or not.

You know I'm going to have to write a full review of that movie… and it's not going to be pretty. But I'm going to feel like a dick posting it here right after you just did a post talking about how much you love it.

So I might not post it here.
christine

HAH! I wasn't being sarcastic!
I think you should do a review of it. I think you have valid opinions and I am curious as to why the film didn't work for you. So I say post away!
Joe Humphrey

I just finished it! Though I realized after the fact that I stole your line about the laser beam busting your face open. Sorry bout that!