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Saving Private Ryan is to Rambo as…
…a meal at a fine Italian restaurant is to a can of Chef Boyardee Beef Ravioli…or something like that. I saw the latest addition to the Rambo series last night. I heard that some critics r
Published on April 1, 2008 | Filed under Review

…a meal at a fine Italian restaurant is to a can of Chef Boyardee Beef Ravioli…or something like that.

I saw the latest addition to the Rambo series last night. I heard that some critics really enjoyed this film, so I was really hoping for the best. Here is the long and short of it: an aging Vietnam vet leads a group of American missionaries into war ridden Burma. Of course things go badly, innocent Americans die, Rambo and a small team of church hired mercenaries travel into Burma to find possible survivors. The plot was thin, the dialogue trite and the film’s namesake, bloated. I think the filmmakers skimped out on a recognizable cast in favor of barrels of fake blood and explosives. Julie Benz stars as the only female missionary in the American group. I’m not sure why she is in this film, she maybe has twelve spoken lines and has little opportunity to show her range as an actor (see: Showtime’s series Dexter). Unrelated side note: Julie Benz will in star in Punisher: War Zone, sadly she will also star in Saw V. Although I’d like to say Benz was a bright spot in the film, I can’t. Her character was one dimensional and I didn’t care if she was beheaded by an automatic weapon or not. Which brings me to the violence…excessive is a good word for it, but the 15 year old in me might say it was pretty awesome. Heads, throats, legs, arms, torsos, feet, hands and entire body’s…no one was safe (except Rambo), not even tiny Southeast Asian children. But, like anything else that got old. Like any good Rambo film the ending was pretty standard, some people lived, some people died. But in the end John Rambo learned a bit more about himself and as any self respecting elderly person will tell you, that’s what life is all about. I hear there’s possibly another Rambo movie in the works…to quote the late Richard Crenna, “It’s over, Johnny. It’s over!”

Designer and Publisher. Fan of Carpenter, De Palma, the Revenge of the Nerds series, reading subtext theories, film poster art, and soundtracks, among other things. Not a film critic nor an academic, just passionate about the medium.
Dylan Santurri

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